oh my god it just hit me what if Mario is actually the original Florida Man?
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I mean some of the very first things we learn about him is that he has a beef with this giant ape and he loves to drop shrooms and then go jump on turtles dude needs help
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his gf is waaay out of his league and whenever they want to do something she's like "oh sorry, no time this weekend, abducted again!" by this giant turtle jock dude... and then has her literal toadies all around the country tell Mario "sorry dude, wrong castle" when he comes by
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just saying his life seems kinda a mess and he's probably not the most reliable narrator especially since the defining characteristic of his best friend, his brother, is that Luigi's a coward you just know he'd chicken out on an intervention 10 times out of 10
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